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arguing with a fire pilot is a lot like wrestling with a pig in the mud:  after a while you begin to think the pig likes it.

THE CODE:

All pirates have always known that discipline is necessary onboard the ship. Here are some rules set down by Captains John Phillips and Bartholomew Roberts (as modified by necessity by us here at firepirates.com). Historically, before sailing, each crewmember had to swear to abide by the rules of the code of conduct.

  1. Everyone shall obey orders. Period.
  2. Booty will be shared out as follows: 1 share to every ordinary airman; 1½ shares to the captain; 1¼ shares to the master carpenter, boatswain, and gunner.
  3. Anyone keeping secret of attempting to desert will be marooned. A deserter may take only a flask of gunpowder, a bottle of water, a firearm, and some shot (and ONE bottle of rum only by vote of other crewmembers). No vixens will be taken ashore in case of marooning, and there are NO exceptions to this.
  4. The punishment for hitting a man on duty is 90 lashes on the bare back (or bare ass if you strike a wench), and we're not talking noodles here. The punishment for hitting a man off duty is negotiable -- depending on who saw what. The punishment for hitting a wench, though, is something far worse ... that you don't want to hear about!
  5. Anyone being lazy or failing to clean weapons will lose their share of booty.
  6. Everyone may vote on all important decisions.
  7. Everyone may have a share of captured drink and fresh food -- and vixens too, should they happen to be captured and willing.
  8. Anyone found stealing from another member of the crew will have his ears and nose slit open and be set ashore.
  9. Gambling with cards and money is forbidden. (Gambling in strip poker is okay if approved in advance and we get to watch.)
  10. The penalty for bringing a woman aboard in disguise is death, UNLESS we check out the wench's disguised and undisguised personae and approve, in which case probation may be issued.
  11. No one may leave the crew until each man has made 1,100 pounds. Or a fire season's income. Or 225 pounds if you're over 6 foot in your socks.
  12. The compensation of losing a limb is 800 silver dollars, unless you can prove it's worth more than that. The fine for removing someone else's limb is twice as much.